Loving your body just as it is sounds simple enough, right? You hear it all the time: “Love yourself!” It’s splashed across social media, on t-shirts, and even printed on coffee mugs. But if you’re anything like me—or the women that I work with—it probably feels more like a cruel joke than an empowering mantra.

Because, if we’re being real, loving your body can feel impossible some days.

I want to unpack this with you—not from a place of judgment, but from a place of honesty and shared experience. Because I’ve been there. And maybe you’re there now, too.

The Truth About Why It’s So Hard To Love Your Body

Here’s the thing: learning to love your body is an uphill climb, but it’s not because there’s something wrong with you. It’s because of everything you’ve been taught about what bodies should look like—and the sneaky little voice in your head that tells you yours isn’t good enough.

For years, we’ve been surrounded by messages telling us that smaller is better, that smooth is ideal, and that only certain bodies deserve love, attention, or even basic respect.

The diet culture industry thrives on insecurity. It needs you to feel bad about your body so you’ll buy the magic pill, the perfect exercise routine, or the latest supplements, greens, or cleanses..

And even when you’ve done the brave work of healing your relationship with food, those messages can stick. It’s no wonder we end up feeling like loving our bodies is a battle we’re destined to lose.

It’s Not Just About the Mirror

When I was deep in my own journey of recovery, I thought loving my body meant I had to like what I saw in the mirror every single day.

But I’ve learned that body image isn’t really about your reflection—it’s about the story you tell yourself when you see it.

If you have followed along with me on Instagram, you know I love to say “what story are you telling yourself right now?”

For years, my story was full of harsh criticisms and impossible expectations. I would look at my body and think:

• “If only I could tone my stomach, I’d be happy.”
• “Why do I look like this? What’s wrong with me?”
• “I’ll never look like her.”
• “I can’t believe I’m in a relationship looking like this!”

Sound familiar?

Those thoughts aren’t just mean—they’re exhausting. And they don’t just show up when you’re in front of a mirror. They creep in when you’re shopping for clothes, scrolling Instagram, or getting dressed after getting out of the shower..

They tell you lies that make loving your body feel like an impossible reality.

What If Loving Your Body Isn’t the Goal?

Here’s a little secret I wish someone had told me earlier: loving your body doesn’t have to mean adoring it all the time. It doesn’t mean you never have bad days. It doesn’t mean you always feel confident.

Sometimes, the goal isn’t love. Sometimes, the goal is respect. Or gratitude. Or even just neutrality.

What if, instead of trying to force yourself to love your body, you tried to appreciate it for what it does for you? What if you focused on the moments when your body carries you through life, even when you’re not being kind to it?

Where to Start 👇🏼

If you’re struggling to love your body right now, start small. Here are a few ideas:

1. Talk to yourself like you’d talk to a friend. When that critical voice begins to get loud, ask yourself: “Would I say this to someone I care about?” or “What would I say to my best friend if she had these thoughts about her body right now?”
2. Curate your environment. Unfollow accounts that make you feel like you need to “fix” your body. Follow people who celebrate diverse bodies instead.
3. Focus on function, not appearance. Your legs let you ride your bike around the neighborhood and walk your dog. Your arms let you hug your grandparents and your little nieces and nephews that remind you of your younger self. Your stomach digests your favorite foods and provides a safe place for majority of your organs to thrive. Amazing, right?
4. Practice neutrality. Instead of saying, “I love my thighs,” try, “These are my thighs. I don’t always love them, but they’re part of me.”
5. Provide Self Comfort: If your story is anything like mine, these thoughts have probably been with you since a very young age. What did younger you need the first time you thought you needed to change your body? Did they need a hug? A reminder that you are unique and that is really freaking awesome?

You’re Not Alone, Promise

If loving your body feels hard, it’s because it is hard—but not because you’re failing. It’s hard because the world has taught us to measure our worth by the way we look.

But here’s what I want you to know: you’re so much more than your reflection. And even on the days when you can’t love your body, you can still choose to care for it, respect it, and give it the kindness it deserves.

You don’t have to get it perfect. You just have to keep showing up—for yourself, and for the body that’s been showing up for you all along.

If you’re ready to start practicing, check out my 30-Day Body Positive Challenge. 🎉

It’s filled with simple, actionable habits to help you embrace your here-and-now body—no matter how far along you are on your journey. Because learning to love your body starts with small steps, and I’m here to take them with you.